Pop Six Squish Uh Uh Cicero LipSchitz
by NymphaTonksLupin
Summary: I guess you can guess what song this will be. Cell Block Tango, in case you didn't know. Just a little attempt. There is murder inside. Enjoy, I guess : Hermione/Ron Luna/Rolf Tonks/Remus Fleur/Bill Pavarti/OC/Padma Ginny/Harry Rated M, because there are murders. I don't know what I should rate it in that case. haha
1. Hermione Pop

_**Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling, **_

_**I also don't own Chicago. Or the song. Which, btw, is Cell Block Tango from the musical Chicago. Watch it if you haven't. **_

_**This is a sad attempt. Bad attempt. Because our favourite girls from Harry Potter are going to be murderers. Yay! These chapters will be short. Just a warning. **_

_**Real lyrics :D  
You know how people**_

_**have these little habits**_

_**That get you down. Like Bernie.**_

_**Bernie like to chew gum.**_

_**No, not chew. POP.**_

_**So I came home this one day**_

_**And I am really irritated, and I'm**_

_**looking for a bit of sympathy**_

_**and there's Bernie layin'**_

_**on the couch, drinkin' a beer**_

_**and chewin'. No, not chewin'.**_

_**Poppin'. So, I said to him,**_

_**I said, "you pop that**_

_**gum one more time..."**_

_**and he did.**_

_**So I took the shotgun off the wall**_

_**and I fired two warning shots... **_

_**...into his head.**_

Hermione stormed into the house. Her day had been terrible and all she wanted to do was relax. Of course, she'd probably have to spend the evening telling Ron to stop biting his nails. He had gotten into the happen and Hermione didn't know why.

Ron was sitting on the couch looking completely relaxed.

"Didn't you have work today?" She snapped.

"Nope." Ron said, biting at his nail.

"I swear to Merlin, Ronald. Bite your nails one more time." Hermione growled.

Ron stared at her for a minute before doing just that. Hermione whipped her wand out and without thinking, cast Avada Kedavra.

She stared at the body of her dead husband as the Aurors began showing up.


	2. Luna Six

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or Chicago. Sadly.**_

_**Real Lyrics :D**_

_**I met Ezekiel Young from**_

_**Salt Lake city about two years ago**_

_**and he told me he was single**_

_**and we hit it off right away.**_

_**So, we started living together.**_

_**He'd go to work, he'd come home, I'd**_

_**fix him a drink, We'd have dinner.**_

_**And then I found out,**_

_**"Single" he told me?**_

_**Single, my ass. Not only**_

_**was he married**_

_**...oh, no, he had six wives.**_

_**One of those Mormons, you know. So that**_

_**night, when he came home, I fixed him**_

_**his drink as usual.**_

_**You know, some guys just can't hold**_

_**their arsenic.**_

Luna wasn't one to get upset. She loved Rolf. He said he loved her as well.

But he lied to her. He didn't love her. If he loved her, why would he have the other wives?

"Luna, I'm home, honey!" Rolf called.

Luna stared at the drink. She pulled the vial out and dumped the contents into the glass. She picked up the glass and carried it to Rolf.

"Hi, honey." She said, handing him the glass. "How was your day?"

Rolf drained the glass in one take. "It was g-"

He fell silent and fell forward onto the ground. Luna stared at her dead husband silently.


	3. Tonks Squish

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Chicago. Sadly.**_

_**Real Lyrics :D**_

_**Now, I'm standing in the kitchen**_

_**carvin' up the chicken for dinner,**_

_**minding my own business,**_

_**and in storms my husband Wilbur,**_

_**in a jealous rage.**_

_**"You been screwin' the milkman,"**_

_**he says. He was crazy**_

_**and he kept screamin',**_

_**"you been screwin the milkman."**_

_**And then he ran into my knife.**_

_**He ran into my knife ten times.."**_

It was the day after Full Moon. She knew he'd be in a bad mood. Usually, he'd be distant to her. Distant and in a bad mood. He's never taken it out on her. Until he began to think she was cheating. She knew she wasn't cheating. Why would she? She had no reason.

She was cutting up some chicken for dinner when he stormed into the house, and straight to her.

"Who is he? I know you're cheating!" Remus was yelling. "Look at me when I'm talking!" he snapped, spinning her around to face him.

The knife seemed to act on it's own accord. Ten times, and he was dead. Tonks dropped the knife, the blood seeping from Remus' chest onto the floor.


	4. Fleur Uh Uh

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Or Chicago.**_

_**I'm just a teen girl playing with ideas. So enjoy. **_

_**Real Lyrics**_

_**Mit keresek, én itt? Azt mondják,**_

_**hogy a híres lakem lefogta a férjemet én meg **_

_**lecsaptam a fejét. De nem igaz, én ártatlan **_

_**vagyok. Nem tudom miért mondja **_

_**Uncle Sam, hogy én tettem. Probáltam**_

_**a rendõrségen megmagyarázni de nem értették meg...**_

**Yeah, but did you do it?**

_**UH UH, not guilty!**_

Fleur loved Bill. She wouldn't hurt him. Not like the others. She wouldn't do anything to Bill. She wouldn't kill him.

She hadn't done it, but no one would listen.

She had gone out for the day, to meet her parents for lunch at a nice restaurant in London. She came home, and she found Bill dead.

She didn't know what happened, but would the Aurors listen? Fleur couldn't explain she hadn't done it. She had tried, but she hadn't done it. And they wouldn't listen.


	5. Padma Pavarti Cicero

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Chicago. **_

_**Sadly.**_

_**Real Lyrics: **_

_**My sister, Veronica and**_

_**I had this double act**_

_**and my husband, Charlie,**_

_**traveled around with us.**_

_**Now, for the last number in**_

_**our act, we did 20 acrobatic tricks**_

_**one two three four,five...splits, spread eagles,**_

_**back flips,flip flops,**_

_**one right after the other.**_

_**Well, this one night we were in the hotel Cicero,**_

_**the three of us, **_

_**boozin' and**_

_**havin' a few laughs**_

_**when we run out of ice.**_

_**So I went out to get some.**_

_**I come back, open the door**_

_**and there's Veronica and**_

_**Charlie doing Number Seventeen-**_

_**the spread eagle.**_

_**Well, I was in such a state of shock, **_

_**I completely blacked out.I can't remember a thing. **_

_**It wasn't until later, **_

_**when I was washing the blood off my hands **_

_**I even knew they were dead.**_

Padma loved her sister. She trusted her. She let Pavarti live with her and her husband. She didn't expect what had happened.

She had gone out to get some groceries, and she came home to find Pavarti and her husband sleeping together on the couch.

Padma had dropped the groceries. She didn't remember anything else until she was surrounded by Aurors. They were dead. And she didn't remember doing it.

She couldn't have done it.


	6. Ginny LipSchitz

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Or Chicago. Boo.**_

_**Real Lyrics: **_

_**I loved Alvin Lipschitz**_

_**more than I can possibly say.**_

_**He was a real artistic guy...**_

_**sensitive... a painter.**_

_**But **_

_**He was always trying**_

_**to find himself.**_

_**He'd go out every night**_

_**looking for himself**_

_**and on the way**_

_**he found Ruth,**_

_**Gladys,**_

_**Rosemary and Irving.**_

_**I guess you can say we broke**_

_**up because of artistic differences.**_

_**He saw himself as alive**_

_**and I saw him dead.**_

Ginny was annoyed. She had seen him. With Cho Chang. And Angelina Johnson, Hannah Abbott and Katie Bell. Of all people Angelina!

Harry deserved everything coming to him.

He saved the Wizarding World. So what. He was the Chosen One. So what.

He deserved to die. Clearly, Ginny and Harry had some differences.

He saw himself as The Boy Who Lived, and she saw him as The Boy Who Died.


End file.
